Fool for Love
by Rointheta
Summary: Rose accidentally has her feelings for the Doctor removed. Excerpt: "Rose doesn't take the Doctor's hand any more, and when he takes hers, she slips out of his grip almost right away. She only hugs him after they've saved the day — and barely that. He used to feel her racing heart under his hands splayed over her ribcage, but now she's calm and doesn't linger in his embrace."


Written after an anon on tumblr prompted me for a fic where Rose can't handle loving the Doctor and has her love for him taken away. This isn't quite that, but hopefully close enough. :)

This is technically a crossover with Buffy, but you don't need to know anything at all about that show to understand this fic. I've just borrowed a minor character.

**Beta**: resile (and thanks to crazygirlne for a read-through, because I felt a bit insecure about the fic).

* * *

**FOOL FOR LOVE**

* * *

"Sometimes I wonder how much easier life would be if I just didn't love him, you know what I mean?" Rose stirs her fruity drink with the pink umbrella stuck into the crushed ice. "I'm just so tired of feeling like this."

"Like what?" The only other human in the bar, Hallie – who's been sitting with Rose for an hour, listening to her rant about French mistresses and broken mirrors – tilts her head to the side and smiles, brown curls bouncing around her friendly face.

"Heartbroken, I suppose." Rose sighs. "Like tonight, yeah? So, we were at this bar earlier today, when the Doctor overheard something about this ball at the palace. And he wanted us all to go. Me, him, and my mate Mickey. Yeah, like I wanna do that. Spend an entire evening watching him dance with royalty and butter them up. No. Not so soon after France. I just couldn't."

"Who would? It was a horrible, horrible thing for him to do." Hallie lets out a soft hum. "Makes me wonder if a man like that truly deserves your love."

"He did apologise."

"Oh, I'm sure he did." Hallie purses her lips. "They always do, but do they mean it?"

"He's not like that, though. You don't know him. Not like I do. He's wonderful. And so important and–"

"And what about you? Aren't you wonderful? Aren't you important?" Hallie leans closer and puts her hand over Rose's. "Don't you deserve to be loved?"

"I…" Rose frowns and drops the umbrella, which bounces against the rim of the glass and drops on the counter. "Suppose I never thought of it like that."

"Maybe it's time you did."

"And what? Leave him? No, I don't want that. I love this life. The only problem is my feelings for him. I guess I wish…"

Hallie nods encouragingly, giving Rose her full attention. "Yes?"

"Dunno, sometimes I just wish– Just sometimes, though, yeah? Like, when it's really bad."

"Wish what? You can tell me. Just us girls here."

"I wish I didn't love him any more."

"Done." Hallie's dark brown eyes glimmer, and her once friendly smile looks almost triumphant.

"What?"

"My drink. I finished it." The woman is all warm smiles again, exuding a motherly quality that could best even Jackie's, and Rose blames the bad lighting and the three drinks in her stomach for playing tricks on her. "It was lovely talking to you, Rose. But I'm afraid I must dash. Good luck!"

"Thanks. And thanks for listening. I really appreciate it."

"My pleasure. I could tell you really needed someone to talk to." She rises from the barstool and heads for the door, sing-songing, "I can always tell." 

* * *

**.**

* * *

Rose doesn't take the Doctor's hand any more, and when he takes hers, she slips out of his grip almost right away.

She only hugs him after they've saved the day – and barely that. He used to feel her racing heart under his hands splayed over her ribcage, but now she's calm and doesn't linger in his embrace.

She gives him bright and friendly smiles, but never that special smile she reserved for him – the one that set his hearts aflutter.

When he settles down on the sofa and lays his arm on the backrest so she can cuddle into his side, she ignores the gesture. She sits down next to Mickey instead, eyes directed at the screen, as though film night no longer is an excuse to snuggle up with the Doctor.

He stops taking Rose's hand.

He only hugs her when they're reunited after danger – and barely even then.

He smiles and laughs, but never beams or giggles.

He spends his evenings tinkering. Telly's bloody useless anyway. 

* * *

**.**

* * *

The Doctor can't do anything but watch as Mickey slowly fills the vacancy of the most important man in Rose Tyler's life. When she has something to say, she turns to Mickey first, eyes lit up with an excited smile. When she needs comfort, she reaches for him and pulls him in for a tight hug. When she grows sleepy, she rests her head on his shoulder. The two fall into the familiar relationship of people who've known each other since childhood. The Doctor can't remember ever feeling this invisible. 

* * *

**.**

* * *

The Doctor walks into the galley one morning, greeted by the sight of Rose and Mickey dancing around with flour on their clothes and batter on their flushed cheeks. On the counter stands dirty bowls, and in the oven, a loaf of banana bread is baking. The Doctor's lips curl into a silent snarl, and he's doing a valiant effort of killing Mickey with his mind. Not that the other man notices; he only has eyes for Rose. She laughs and places a kiss on Mickey's nose and, when she pulls back, her eyes connect with his and they have a moment – the kind that leads to a whole other type of kissing.

"Enough!" the Doctor shouts before he can think better of it.

They spring apart and stare at him as if he were an intruder, and not the last of the Time Lords who's been reduced to fifth wheel aboard his own ship.

"What's got into you?" Rose asks with a frown.

"Mickey, out," the Doctor says, nodding at the door behind him. "Rose, we're having a talk."

The other man rushes out of the room, and Rose sits down at the table, wearing a bemused expression. The Doctor takes a deep breath and settles down opposite her, back straight and head held high.

"This has been going on long enough, Rose. You've made your point."

"What are you talking about?"

"This!" He shoots his hand back and forth between them. "Whatever the hell you're doing."

"I'm not doing anything."

"Are too! You're ignoring me!"

"No, I'm not. I talk to you all the time."

"Yes, but you've stopped– If I didn't know better, I'd think you and Mick–" The pink flooding to her cheeks strangles his voice, and his hearts plummet to the pit of his stomach. "Oh."

"I don't know. Maybe?" She picks at her nails, twirls her hoop earring, and fixes her eyes on a point somewhere to the left of his head. "Never thought I'd feel like that for him again, but he's changed. He's changed so much. These weeks, travelling with us, he's grown up. He's a man now. And, uhm, yeah. Suppose I do fancy him a bit. But we've not…" She shrugs and shakes her head. "Dunno if he feels like that for me any more."

"You're serious." The words come out in a whisper, and the Doctor's face is frozen in wide-eyed shock.

"Yeah. Is that all right? We've never really talked about– I mean, d'you have rules or something? It's your ship and that."

"I've travelled with couples before," he says in a monotone voice, then stands up and leaves the room, pretending to not hear her calling after him. 

* * *

**.**

* * *

He keeps an eye out after that, for hickeys, rumpled clothing, and stolen kisses and glances and touches. At first, he only sees the flirting increase, but it's enough for him to tell himself that tomorrow he'll drop her off. Then, as morning comes – at least according to Rose's internal clock – and she walks into the console room with a smile on her face, his damn stomach swoops and he sets the coordinates for another brilliant destination in hopes of everything returning to normal.

Then, barely a week later, he sees them drift apart. Mickey seeks out the Doctor's company more and more, and even takes to assisting him when he tinkers, instead of spending his evenings snuggling with Rose in the media room. It doesn't take long for it to draw her to the console room as well. She doesn't chat and laugh with them, though. No, she sits on the jump seat, pouting, and follows Mickey's every movement with her eyes.

When they're out, saving the day, she's more focussed on Mickey and what he's doing than the safety of others. It worries the Doctor, but he never gets a chance to make sense of it, because on their next trip, the TARDIS hurtles through a tear between dimensions and crash-lands in a parallel universe. When they step outside and see zeppelins in the sky, hope flares up in him that the universe will sort this problem for him by leading Mickey to a gingerbread house and having him succumb to temptation. Whatever little crush she's been nurturing for Mickey will subside soon enough, and she'll remember whom she really loves.

The universe pulls through, and the Doctor readies himself to comfort the heartbroken Rose. However, she barely gives him a glance and asks, between sobs, to be taken home to her mother. Without waiting for a reply, she rushes out of the console room – tears streaming down her face – for a shower and a change of clothes.

Whilst waiting, the Doctor takes a long hard look at himself. He's not love's fool – he can't afford to be – and it's time for Rose to return to Earth for good. Yet, after they've materialised in Jackie's living room, and the still crying Rose has curled up in her mother's arms, he finds himself slumping down on the sofa instead of sneaking off. With a steaming cuppa in hand, he blocks out Rose's semi-lucid explanations to her mother and watches his first hour of telly in weeks. 

* * *

**.**

* * *

"Something's wrong," Jackie whispers to him over Rose's sleeping form, where she lies between them on the sofa. "Something's wrong with my little girl."

"Oh?"

"There's something different about her. And not in a good way, either."

"She did just lose Mickey and watch a parallel version of you get Cyberized. Would make anyone–"

"No, that's not what I mean. Although… She did talk about him like, oh, I don't know, almost like she fancied him a bit, didn't she? But that can't be it. Oh, what is it?" Jackie furrows her brow and stares into her cup of tea, sitting silent for such a long while the Doctor jolts at the sound of her voice once she speaks again. "Oh, I know what it is! She doesn't shine any more, does she? She's just plain old Rose."

"There's nothing plain about Rose. Or old, for that matter."

"Oh, you know what I mean," Jackie says with a wave of her hand. "She used to just sit there, staring at the telly. I could tell she was bored and everything, and I reckoned she thought she was too good for us. Too good for this life. Was getting airs and graces and all. 'Cause I didn't get it. It's not that she's too good for it. It just wasn't right for her, d'you know what I mean?"

"Yeah."

"And ever since she's met you, she's shined, she has." Jackie smiles. "Always so happy. Like she lived the perfect life. And some of that change is still there. The confidence. But not the radiance." Jackie nods to herself as though she's said something very wise. "Not the radiance. Did something happen?"

"I don't know. I don't think so."

"And how are things between you two, then?"

"Have to say, you sure can tell much from, what, a two hour talk?"

"I'm her mother! I spent every day with her for nineteen years. And don't you try and change the subject."

He sighs. "We're fine."

Jackie considers him for a moment, blue eyes piercing through him, and he has to struggle to keep his poker face. Then she nods. "How long since you've eaten?"

"Oh. Ehm," he inhales, lifting his eyebrows, "ten hours? Well, fifteen. Twenty."

Jackie narrows her eyes, jutting her index finger at him. "This better not be normal for you two. Going all day without eating." She shakes her head and stands up. "I'll run down to the chippy. And if she happens to wake up whilst I'm gone, just ask her what's wrong, you muppet." She gets up and leaves the room, but he hears her mutter from the hallway, "Lord knows she doesn't talk to me any more. Not about that." 

* * *

**.**

* * *

Five minutes and thirty-three seconds after Jackie left the flat, Rose shifts in her sleep and lays her head in the Doctor's lap. His arms shoot up in the air, as though he's caught red-handed, eyes locked on her. She turns on her side, cheek pressing against his leg, one hand curled over his knee. Soft snores escape her parted lips and a soppy smile spreads over his face. His fingers move on their own accord, brushing a strand of hair from her forehead. Once, this would've been normal for them, but now her head weighs down on his thigh, as heavy as his conscience for stealing a moment of closeness after weeks of deprivation.

He exhales and slides one hand underneath her head, to support it whilst he scoots to the side, but she opens her eyes before he's had a chance to move.

"Hi," she says, voice thick from sleep.

"Hello."

"What are you doing?"

"I was– You, er, well, you moved in your sleep."

"Oh." She sits up and rubs her eyes, yawning. "Sorry."

"That's all right. I don't mind."

"Yeah, I know you don't. Why is that, anyway? It's so weird. Didn't it make you uncomfortable?"

"What?"

"You know, back when I was in love with you," she says, and the tense she used almost floors him. "We were so close, all the time. And you didn't mind, did you? And you don't mind now. it's like it doesn't mean anything to you. But Mickey…" Her mouth twitches and she sniffs, then hides her face in her palms. "I tried to seduce him," she says, words muffled by her palms, and the Doctor's glad she can't see the blood drain from his face. "But he turned me down. Thought I was just trying to make you jealous. But I really love him. I really do. But after that he didn't even wanna touch me. But you never minded," she says, hands dropping to her lap, and she gives him an almost accusatory look. "Even though you knew I would've done anything to be with you."

He opens his mouth to respond, but his mind is blank and he ends up sitting with his jaw slack and his fingers digging into the armrest.

"Oh, don't even bother acting surprised. I know you knew. I think everyone did, to be honest. I wasn't exactly subtle, was I? It's nice, though."

"Hm?"

"To just be mates. I mean, I was pathetic, yeah? Was like I was living off crumbs. A hug here; a cuddle there. Anything I could get, just to be close to you. I don't get how you could stand it."

He nods slowly and reaches for his tea cup, swallowing down its contents even though the tea's gone cold and is so bitter he realises it's not his cup at all. It's Jackie's. He grimaces and puts down the empty cup on the table with a clank.

"I thought I was gonna stay with you forever." Rose laughs and looks at him the way she used to when they shared an inside joke. He plasters a grin on his face to hide how it feels as if someone's shoving his hearts into a shredder. "What a joke. I was gonna, what, live off hugs for the rest of my life? Pretend like I didn't want more? Did you even want me to stay forever?"

"Well," he says, and it sounds as though someone forced gravel down his throat, "I'm happy for you. That you moved on."

She smiles at him, and he has to duck his head because meeting her eyes right now will surely break the little defense he has left. "Me too. I really thought I was gonna love you all my life, 'cause how could anyone ever compare to the Doctor? But then I just woke up one day, and the feeling was gone. I didn't love you any more."

His head snaps back to hers. "What? You what?"

"Didn't love you any more. Haven't you been listening? Mind you, you seem a bit off. Are you all right?"

He leans closer, brow knitted, and looks her straight in the eye. "You woke up one day, and the feeling was gone? You went to bed, loving me, and woke up…not?"

"Yeah. God, you're weird today."

"Rose, doesn't that sound strange to you?"

"No."

"Feelings don't just disappear like that. Not overnight."

"It did to me."

"When?"

She rolls her eyes and sighs. "Not everything's a mystery to solve, Doctor. I don't love you any more. So what? It's better that way, yeah? If I get over– Once I get over Mickey, everything will be good again."

"When?" the Doctor says in his very, very calm voice.

"The morning after that ball. The one I didn't go to, you know? I went back to the bar where we had lunch instead. Didn't feel like being alone. Then I went back to the TARDIS, fell asleep, and woke up feeling brand new. And when I went to the console room and saw you there my stomach didn't flip or anything. I didn't wanna hug you or kiss you or push you against the console and–"

"Did you drink something? Eat something? Touch a weird plant? Or maybe a bug? Were you bitten by something?"

"I had three fruit drinks. Uhm," she closes her eyes and scrunches up her face as she thinks, "Golden Shower! That's what they called it. I chose it because it made me laugh. Didn't eat anything. Wasn't bitten by a bug or nothing. I just had my drinks and a chat with this really nice woman. Hallie."

"Hallie?"

"Yeah, she'd just been dumped by her boyfriend, saw that I wasn't exactly looking happy myself, and we ended up talking about men and how stupid they are."

"And then what? Did she touch you? Give you something? Maybe read your fortune?"

"Blimey, you're paranoid. She was really nice and friendly, and you're acting like she's some sort of monster."

"She very well might be! Well, not a monster, but an alien."

"She looked perfectly human to me."

"Huh. And how many other humans did you see in that bar?"

"Uhm… Me?"

"Right. And how did she explain her presence?"

Rose shifts in her seat. "It didn't come up."

"And how did she react when you complained about your time tra– The time travelling man in your life, hm?"

The colour of Rose's cheeks turn into a deep crimson. "She didn't. Oh, for the– You're right. It does sound strange."

"Right. That's it. We're going to the sickbay.

"Yeah." Rose sighs, bottom lip pouting. "Should've known it was too good to be true."

* * *

**.**

* * *

It takes him ten minutes to figure it out: Rose met a justice demon.

"Or, that's what they like to call themselves," he says. "Justice demons. Vengeance demons. But there's no such thing. They're ordinary humans who've been chosen by an ancient race from the planet Arashmaharr to be genetically altered into human-Arashmaharrian hybrids."

"Chosen how?"

"Does 'Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,' sound familiar?"

"Really? They recruit bitter women?"

"Nah, that's not– Women who've suffered and then used 'magic'," he says, making air quotes and rolling his eyes, "to get revenge. You said her name was Hallie. Could be enough to help us find her so you can change ba–"

Rose stops him by placing her hand on his arm. "Do we really have to?"

"What?"

"Is it so bad? Can't we just let it be like this? You made me so happy, Doctor, but at the same time… You're not an easy man to love, you're not."

For the briefest moment he's tempted to let her have this. She wouldn't stay with him long, not like this. No, she'd return to Earth, find a husband, and settle down, live safe and happy for the rest of her life. What's one more heartbreak for him when he could give her that? Then Jackie's words come back to him, about Rose changing for the worse, and he replays the last few weeks' events in his mind. And, now that heartbreak no longer clouds his judgment, he can see it too.

He draws his eyebrows together and an apologetic smile forms on his lips. "I'm so sorry, Rose, but we have to stop her. These justice demons, they find heartbroken women, or women that have been wronged somehow, women who're sad and lonely, and coax them into making a wish. The wish lets them form an alternate reality, and they feed off it. Them and their masters. Feed off all the broken timelines. All the things that should've happened but never will. This reality we're living, it feels real to us, but it should never have happened."

"But nothing bad's happened."

"Maybe not to you but– You know what kind of wishes people make without thinking. They wish people would hurt themselves. Get sick. Lose what's important to them. Even die. These demons have slaughtered villages, Rose."

"So? What's to say they all don't deserve it? You said it yourself: justice demon. Justice."

"Can't you hear yourself? This isn't you. You're not this selfish and callous."

"Yeah, well, maybe it's time I start thinking about myself." She touches her chest. "Don't I deserve to be loved for once? Look, I love Mickey, but he doesn't love me back. And now he's gone and I just wanna curl up in my bed and cry myself to sleep. But I can't. 'Cause I have to summon a demon who'll give me back my feelings for a man who doesn't want me. And then I'll be stuck. I'll love you forever and you won't even want me back. What's in it for me? Don't you get it? Now I have a chance to find someone else. Like, uhm," she snaps her fingers, brow furrowed, "Jack! I always did fancy Jack. I think I could love him. Yeah, I did love him, come to think of it. He had the most gorgeous eyes and he was so fit. And that bum! And I know he loved me back. We'd be great together, we would. Yeah, we–"

"Rose," he says, reaching out for her, but she eludes him. "Rose, please listen to me. Your feelings aren't real. It's easier to re-direct feelings than to make them go away completely. And that's what I think she did. But now Mickey's gone and you need someone new to love – someone who's not me – and you're already convincing yourself you're in love with Jack! Can't you hear how ridiculous this sounds?"

"You always were jealous of Jack," she says, scowling at him. "Of course you don't approve. But you can't make me, Doctor. You can force me to go back to living off crumbs."

"I don't need your permission. I can figure this out on my own. And I have to, because you're not yourself, and I can't just stand by watching you– And if that means that you'll leave me, then so be it. But," he moves closer and catches her hand, weaving their fingers together, "I'd rather do this with you by my side. 'Cause, Rose–" He exhales and closes his eyes. "I can't believe I'm telling you like this, when you won't even like hearing it, but… Rose, you wouldn't live off crumbs."

"What?"

"These past few weeks, you've not– You've barely even hugged me. And I've hated every second of it."

"Yeah, well, tough. I'm not obligated to give you hugs just 'cause you're lonely."

"Oh, that's not why, and I think you know that. The real you. You gotta be in there somewhere," he says, dipping his head a touch to look into her eyes. "The real Rose. My Rose. The Rose who tore my ship apart and returned to a Dalek infested space station, just to be by my side."

"I just walked into the TARDIS and left Mickey," she whispers. "Even though he might need me. I didn't even try to stay in the parallel world with him."

"No. No, you didn't."

"I couldn't leave my mum alone. I just couldn't. But I would have, had it been you. I would've left my mum for you, before that demon removed– You're right. Something's off. This isn't me. But– D'you promise, then? That things would change between us. That I wouldn't live off crumbs. 'Cause I don't want to trade one heartbreak in for another. Already tried that, and it didn't exactly work."

"If you want." He squeezes her hand. "And if you don't, we'll just pretend I never said anything."

She stands quiet for a beat, mulling it over, but doesn't drop his hand or move away, and hope sets his hearts galloping in his chest. Then she nods. "Okay."

He blinks, swallows. "Yeah?"

"Yes."

They find a musty old leather-bound book on human-Arashmaharrian hybrids in the library. Rose flips through it with the same kind of look on her face all the bored teenagers at Deffry Vale wore. But he doesn't allow himself to think about what that means. It's not important any more, anyway. Her heart might not be in it, but she's still agreed to change back.

Then she stops and opens the book properly, pointing at the page. He peers over her shoulder at two portraits of the same brown haired woman wearing a pendant: to the left, she has the soft, supple skin of a twenty year old, and to the right, her skin is decaying and wrinkled in a way that gives her a more demonic appearance.

"There's she is," Rose says. "Halfrek. Huh. Even says how to summon her." She flashes the Doctor a grin that doesn't reach her eyes. "Suppose we're gonna summon ourselves a demon, then, yeah?" 

* * *

**.**

* * *

The Doctor lifts Jackie's coffee table to the side, places a transmat in the centre of her living room and puts a crystal atop it, then sets up a force field around it. With the book about human-Arashmaharrian hybrids in his hand, he backs away to stand beside Rose and reads out loud the incantation that will summon Halfrek. He'd started to explain earlier how this really was science – not magic – but instead of listening and laughing in all the right places, Rose had stopped him with an exaggerated yawn.

He says the last word, the air shimmers above the crystal, and Halfrek appears in a flash. She stands tall in a crimson dress with trumpet sleeves, chin tilted up, right in the middle of the force field. Then her sparkling eyes land on Rose and the Doctor, and she frowns.

"Oh. You again. And you brought your Time Lord."

"You– I trusted you! I thought you were really nice. But you were just using me and–"

"Yada yada yada." Halfrek rolls her eyes. "Whatever you have to say, believe me, I've heard it before and from far more eloquent speakers than you."

"All right." Rose squares her jaw. "I want to take back my wish."

"Once a wish is granted, there are no take backsies. FYI."

"But I didn't even mean it!"

Halfrek smirks. "But you like the result. He's the one suffering. Wasn't that what you wanted?"

"I don't care about your policy, Halfrek," the Doctor says. "You did this. You meddled with something no one's supposed to meddle with. And you're undoing it."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll take your pendant and–"

The sound of bags dropping to the floor cuts him off, and he whirls around, seeing Jackie in the doorway. She heaves a sigh, scoops up the bags from the floor, and shoves them into Rose's arms.

"I don't even wanna know what's going on here. Here's your chips, sweetheart. I'm going to Bev's. Just finish up here, and send me a text when you're done. And if she's gonna explode or something, you two," she bores her eyes into the Doctor, then Rose, "are cleaning it up."

Halfrek gasps. "There will be no exploding of the justice demon!"

Jackie points at the Doctor. "And if you break my coffee table again, you're getting me a new one, you are," she says, and heads out again.

"Right." The Doctor cards a hand through his hair. "Where was I? Oh, right." He narrows his eyes at Halfrek. "I will take your pendant and smash it. You know what that means, hm? It's the only thing stabilising your genetic alteration. Without it you'll turn human again and your little spell will break. And you wouldn't like that very much, would you?"

"Oooh, I'm so scared. Whatever will I do?" She shakes her head and puts her hands on her hips. "Your threats really would work better, Doctor, if you hadn't locked me in a force field, okay? How are you supposed to take my pendant?"

"Ugh," Rose glares at him, "why don't you ever think things through? Would it kill you to come up with a plan for once?"

The Doctor glares right back, then sighs and turns to Halfrek. "Break this alternate reality now or I'll leave you to rot inside that force field."

"First of all, no, you won't. You might have all the time in the world, but she doesn't. And you want her to wuv you again, don't you? Secondly, it's not an alternate reality. Can't you feel that, Time Lord? Or are you too heartbroken?" Halfrek lets out a peal of laughter. "It's just a silly little curse."

"Then lift it!"

"I will do no such thing! It's too much fun watching you. Seeing how long it'll take before she leaves you. I wonder what will happen then. To you. How long do you think you'll manage without her?"

"Is that why you're doing this? Hoping I'll, what, get hurt?"

"You're already hurt, aren't you? But no. No, I'd barely spent five minutes on that dump of a planet – I was banishing someone there. A real piece of work. Had a secret wife in another state. Anyway, I heard poor Rose's pain. It was so loud. So deep. And she was so lonely." Halfrek directs a sympathetic smile at Rose. "You were practically bursting with the need to talk to someone. It's been a while since I had such an easy job." She shoots the Doctor a pointed look. "Whatever heartache you're suffering right now, you deserve it. I am a justice demon, remember?"

He pulls his sonic screwdriver out of his pocket and twirls it between his fingers. "Do you know what this is?"

"Of course."

"Guess how many settings it has."

Halfrek folds her arms over her chest. "Why?"

"Because a standard sonic screwdriver comes with at least a hundred settings. But this isn't a standard sonic screwdriver. Oh, no. Not at all. This sonic," he tosses it in the air and catches it without looking, "is my sonic, and I love inventing new settings for it. Like, say, how to shatter crystals."

Her eyes widen and she touches her pendant. "You wouldn't."

"No?" He twirls it again. "You sure about that?"

"You're lying. If you could, why haven't you already? It would break the curse, make me mortal, and you two could frolic into the sunset together."

He steps closer to Halfrek. "I'm neither judge nor executioner. I prefer giving people a chance to better themselves."

"You'd let me walk? Really."

"Yes. If you promised me that you would stop with all this madness of avenging scorned women."

Halfrek quirks an eyebrow and gives him a once-over. "Deal." She waves her hands in the air with a look of exasperation on her face. "There. Curse lifted. Now let me out."

"Rose?" he says, inching closer to her. She doesn't look at him, even recoils the slightest bit, but nods. "You sure?"

"Yes," she whispers.

The Doctor turns off the force field, and in the back of his mind he registers that Halfrek says something witty and dematerialises with a flourish of her hands, but he's only focussed on Rose.

"You're back," he says with a gentle smile, moving in for their usual celebratory hug, but she backs away.

"Yeah," she says to her feet. "I'm so sorry, Doctor. I didn't know she was a human-Ashamasha hybrid. Didn't know this would happen."

"I know. Rose, how are you– Everything feels like...normal?"

She lets out a hollow chuckle. "My feelings for Mickey are gone. I mean, the ones I developed when– But I can't just– I'm so confused. All these feelings…" She shakes her head, face scrunched up. "I just wanna spend a day with my mum. No blokes. Just me and mum."

"Oh. Right."

"I'm sorry! It's just– This past hour, I've gone from being more in love with Mickey than I've ever been, to falling in love with Jack, to falling back in love with you again, and I know which feelings are supposed to be real, but I– I just feel lost, and I need a moment, all right?"

"Of course. I'll just stay in the TARDIS and you can come back when– Or do you want me to leave?"

"No, you can stay. And, uhm, the chips. We could eat first. If you want. Gotta be hungry, yeah?"

She plops down on the sofa, and he lifts the coffee table into place, watching her whilst she unwraps their fish and chips and tucks into the meal. They let the murmur of the telly fill the uncomfortable silence between them as they eat. Once they've finished, they lean back in the sofa and she breaks out in a yawn. Her heavy eyelids and pallor of her cheeks remind him that she's been up for twenty hours straight, save the little kip on Jackie's sofa, and he places his hand on her shoulder.

"Go to sleep, Rose. I'll tell Jackie to come home."

"Thank you." She heads out of the room, but stops in the doorway, one hand on the jamb. "Doctor? I…" She pauses and, since she looks out into the hall, he can't see her face and has no idea what's running through her head.

"Yes?"

"We'll talk tomorrow. Night." 

* * *

**.**

* * *

The Doctor's just washed oil and grime off his hand and returned to the console with a cuppa when Rose steps through the doors. Although it's well into the afternoon for her, she still wears her jimjams and her face is free of makeup. He places the cup on the jump seat, and waits for her by the console, standing rod-straight.

She fiddles with her hands and bites her lip, padding up to him. "Hi."

"Hi." He clenches his hands and buries them in his pockets to keep himself from reaching out for her. "How are you feeling today?"

"Good. Spent the day eating crisps and watching Bridget Jones with mum," she says, and he nods. "Better get straight to it, then, yeah? Uhm, yeah, I know you just said what you said 'cause you wanted to save me. And, I mean, it worked, so…" She shrugs and licks her lips, keeping her chin tucked and eyes directed at the ground, but it does little to hide her flushed cheeks. "So, yeah. Thanks. And, uhm, I'd still like to travel. If that's all right. I really just want things to return to normal."

He fights the smile threatening to break free. "You never were a very good liar, Rose."

"What?"

"The way I see it, I could take this out you're giving me. Because we both know that's what you're doing. I could take it, and we'd pretend, just like we've been pretending so far, until one day we can't pretend any more. And that seems like an awful waste of time, doesn't it?"

"Uhm," her head perks up, face glowing with breathless anticipation, "suppose?"

"Oh, it does," he says, inching closer. "And I've missed you. Missed being near you."

"Yeah?"

"Yes." He snakes his arm around her waist and presses her closer by splaying his hands at the small of her back. "So, if you wouldn't mind, I'd very much like to kiss you now."

"Are you sure you're ready?" she asks in a gentle voice. "I don't want you to feel like you have to, just 'cause a stupid demo–"

He shows her just how sure he is the only way he knows how: by pressing his mouth to hers. She emits a soft noise of surprise, but her lips are pliant and warm under his, and she links her hands around his neck. He slides his arms over her back until he's wrapped them so tightly around her he can feel every curve of her body pressing into him.

They kiss until Rose pulls back for air, and she looks up at him through her lashes, hands sliding down to his chest to play with his tie. She looks stunned, lips wet and swollen, and he can't help but beam.

"So, Rose Tyler," he says, resting his hands on her hips, "still having doubts about me?"

She shakes her head, smiling, and moves in for another kiss. 

* * *

**.**

* * *

Rose and the Doctor always hold hands: when they run, when they stroll, when they fall asleep together in their bed.

They use any excuse for a hug. Any kind of hug: the lingering embrace that leads to more, the quick hug when they see something exciting, and the desperate, crushing clinging to one another when they're reunited after danger.

Rose adds a brand new smile to her arsenal, reserved just for him – and this one is wicked and makes him remove his tie and fumble with the buttons of his shirt, because it means he's about to get lucky.

When he settles down on the sofa and lays his arm on the backrest so she can cuddle into his side, she often shoots him that special smile – and they end up missing film night altogether. But telly's bloody useless, anyway.

* * *

**the end**


End file.
